I Wish Film Spotlight

Today’s film spotlight focuses on the short film I Wish directed by Haider Rifaat.

What is the title of your film and what inspired said title?

The title of the film is Kaash, which translates to I Wish in English. The word is derived from my Native language Urdu. I really wanted to encapsulate the core of the film in one word, and Kaash seemed to be that perfect title! Since my character in the film suffers from clinical depression, I felt it would be a great idea to have him reimagine his surrounding circumstances. How he wished for things to be different around him, and hoped that life would be easier than it actually is.

Tell us a little bit about the story and origins of your film.

I shot the film myself in Islamabad, Pakistan, where I am originally from. I had no team to work with. I self-produced, wrote, directed, edited and starred in the project. The film centers on Ali Danyal, my character, who experiences clinical depression further exacerbated by his early life experiences, family and social circle. All his past emotions extend into his present-day life, further taking a toll on his mental health. Ali’s present isn’t bright either. The character also suffers because of his toxic workplace environment, coupled with complete abandonment from his parents.

Overall, mental illness in Pakistan is heavily stigmatized. People fail to recognize it as a real problem. Sufferers of mental health issues are socially labeled and stereotyped as “manic” or “insane.” A lot of shame is associated with mental illness, and even seeking treatment is looked down upon in Pakistan. Things are evolving, but we still have a long way to go. So, that idea inspired me to create a film that captures that essence, and what the end result of constant shame, stigmas and stereotyping could wind up being for a person truly experiencing an extreme form of depression.

Any films or filmmakers that inspired this film?

No – I inspired myself to make a short film that has my sense of direction, and no one else’s.

What is the goal of the film for you?

The goal of the film is to have people show more humanity and empathy toward those experiencing mental health issues. I dive deep into my character’s early life experiences including bullying in school and poor support system at home. All these experiences combined had an overarching effect on the character’s present-day life. Nothing improved for him; everything deteriorated and pushed him to the edge. The end result of the film would hopefully make the viewers realize the consequences of not showing support and empathy towards someone who is authentically depressed. If the end result of the film moves you in a manner of having showed some humanity to the main character, my job is done!

I also didn’t want the film to have a happy ending like most projects do. It is so predictable and cliché. Sometimes, it is better to take a film in a unique direction that can shock and possibly, move the audience in a direction that would teach them a lesson.

What has the journey been like getting the film into production?

I shot the entire film in about a week, I would say. I wrote the script and had very limited resources to work with. Just a camera and a tripod. All I needed was to get things moving. Since I had no team, it was double the work but I enjoyed it. I exercised more control that way, both acting and production wise. If you watch the film, at some point, the main character reverberates the feeling of wanting hope in his life. He says, “I wish life was easy.” I wanted to include that bit in the film to tie it with the project’s title I Wish or Kaash to reiterate my point about yearning for a better life.

I am also happy to share that my film was declared as a semi-finalist in the 2021 edition of Stockholm City Film Festival. I Wish is currently being considered for other international film festivals, too.

One thing you learned from this project?

I learned to take mental illness more seriously. Having depicted a character that was clearly experiencing deeply personal problems, that portrayal alone made me introspect more about life and how it would truly feel to live a depressed life. Depression is very layered. It certainly isn’t easy going through it.

How can folks find you and your film online?

The film is available online on YouTube under Haider Rifaat Films. Simply search I Wish short film by Haider Rifaat and you will find the film free to stream. The film is in Urdu language with English subtitles. There are two versions; one is purely in Urdu language titled Kaash and the other one is I Wish with English subtitles.

Any last pieces of advice for fellow filmmakers?

Follow your gut, not someone else’s. Many people out there would want you to be a certain way in how you approach your film, but the end decision is yours, and yours alone. If you have a sense of direction and the resources needed to make a film, get up and do it! Don’t wait for it to happen. Filmmaking is an evolving process. You learn, you unlearn, and you learn again! Be proud of what YOU create!

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